Questions & Answers About Attachment Wounds / Styles
“I don’t know how I got a degree in sociology and have never even heard of any of this stuff!” My client that I’ve been using as an example as I’ve written about attachment wounding and attachment styles over the past number of weeks, made this comment about halfway through his process. “Although it’s not […]
Moving from Disorganized Attachment to Healthy Attachment
“I know that this is the wound that says my ‘attach-er’ is really broken. I guess it’s the granddaddy of all of them!” my client said zestfully with a bit of trepidation … I laughed as I assured him that the same thing applies to what I’ve said about all 3 of the attachment style […]
Moving from Avoidant Attachment to Healthy Attachment
“I hate having to look at this attachment wound!” my client stated with angst. “It is my dad to a T … and it’s what hurts my wife the most!” I nodded with empathy. But I also reminded him to give himself grace for the past. (Because we don’t choose our attachment wounds). And to […]
From Anxious Attachment to Healthy Attachment
“Since we realized I’m all of the above (unhealthy attachments), I guess I need to work on the healing process for all 3?” my client asked with apparent willingness mixed with curiosity. “I actually recommend that even when you’ve identified your primary unhealthy attachments (with one usually being the primary), it is helpful to do […]
The Healthy Attachment Style We All Desire
“I know I can’t go back and redo my childhood, but can I still get to a healthy attachment style?” my client pleaded “You certainly can! I am inserting this piece this week before I talk about the healing process for the 3 unhealthy attachment styles …” I assured him. “I’m sure there’s many of […]
Symptoms of Disorganized Attachment Wounds as Adults: What Their Relationships Look Like
“I finally get it, but I did not choose these attachment wounds, or my attachment style. But why do I feel so much shame about them?” my client asked with almost the tone of a pleading little boy. “I understand, totally,” I assured him. “Although my angel-like mother balanced out a lot of the horrific […]
What A Child with Attachment Wounds Looks Like
“How do you know if someone isn’t getting their needs met or if they’re just needy?” my client asked. “Oh, my goodness … you certainly know how to get me on a soapbox!” I responded immediately. “One hundred percent of humans have four basic needs to survive (safety/security, significance, support and love, surprise/variety) … and […]
Attachment Wounds
“I don’t think I have any attachment wounds … I just don’t attach!” my client mused. I realized he was thinking … as many do … that wounds are things you can see. Rarely are attachment wounds anything you can see externally. The only way to “see” attachment wounds is to look at how people […]
How We Attach Affects EVERYTHING In Our Lives
“The first time you told me I had a ‘connection disorder’ … I thought you meant my mouth and my brain weren’t connected!” my client said to me as he walked in my office. “And maybe that’s true too!” he commented … before I had a chance to say it! We both enjoyed a good […]
Questions/Answers about Fixing What’s Been Broken
“We have a question we’d love for you to answer …” The couple I’d worked with and shared their story with you asked. “Why are couples so resistant to this process? Why isn’t everyone doing it? And how do you convince them it’s necessary and does miracles?” In jest, I turned to […]